The earliest I can remember is when I was Four years old, we were living in a one bedroom apartment with Mom, Dad, my three sisters and one brother. When my Dad came home he was always drunk. Dad was always hurting Mom and beating her. Mom was always yelling at Dad. She was yelling at him to leave her alone but, he wouldn't stop. Because of this she didn't want to get pregnant anymore either. Dad constantly picked on my older brother almost all of the time for no reason. He had a strap that he would use on his hands or sometimes he would use plastic toy car tracks on his hands.

My older brother wouldn't cry at all and this would anger him even more and he would beat him more until he would start crying. Then Dad would put my older brother in the corner on his knees for hours. He was a gifted child and would escape the pain and horror of this by looking at small pictures of animals and by drawing he would enlarge them. He was talented. Dad didn't like this and would constantly call him a " sissy " and a " momma's boy ". This would hurt him deeply. My Dad said that all that he ever wanted was girls in his family. I didn't understand what he meant until years later.

Dad would come in and start on Mom because she didn't clean up the house, the dishes weren't done, and the laundry wasn't done and there were clothes everywhere. Mom was always watching Television or reading her romance novels.

Dad would go and lay down and call me and say " Jeannette come and lay with me ". So I went to lay down and he would put the blanket on me. Mom was busy in the kitchen. Dad would start touching my vagina and I would ask him " What are you doing your hurting me " He would tell me to shut up and to stay quiet. He would take my clothes off and put his penis inside me. I would start crying, tears rolling down my face, and I would keep telling Dad to stop it and leave me alone.

Dad kept telling me to shut up. He didn't want mom to hear me cry. Dad would finally fall